There is nothing more unappreciated than a Black woman. For Okonkwo, he does not see past anything that is not manly, therefore does not believe in the feminine aspect of how things should be done. This idea is highlighted by Iyasere when he mentions that “qualities of love and compassion…which to Okonkwo were marks of femininity and weakness are the same qualitites which were respected by the society [he] wished to champion”, (Iyasere 377). However, it is in fact femininity that saves him, and ultimately “saves” his son as well. This refusal to acknowledge the godliness that is associated with woman is what results in his “defeat” later on in the section.
In the beginning of chapter 14, we see that Okonkwo was not completing his tasks with the same vigor that he used to. This shows that his exile has taken a bigger toll on him than he initially let on, and that he consciously thinks his situation is one of the worsts. However, because he can not see the “feminine” side of things, it is clear that he cannot see how his exile is actually something good that has happened to him. It was a “feminine” crime that allowed him to live in exile, as opposed to something much worse like death in the Evil Forrest, and had his crime been considered “masculine” he would have suffered much worse. His uncle Uchendu explains this to him when everyone has gotten settled after the ceremony. At first, he asks him why he thinks the most popular name among their children is “Mother is Supreme” despite their culture being very patriarchal. No one knows the answer, and so Uchendu goes on to say that he is a child that doesn’t understand and explains that although a child belongs to his father, it is with his mother that he finds comfort, and “when there is sorrow and bitterness he finds refuge in his motherland”, (Achebe 78). This shows that Okonkwo’s “mother’s land” is what saves him, and it is his mother’s tribe that welcomes him wholeheartedly, even helping him get back on his feet. During his time of sorrow and abandonment, it is his mother that he ultimately went to in seeking comfort, just as Uchnedu had explained. He also warns that the more Okonkwo rejects this comfort, the more disrespect he is throwing in the face of his mother and the dead. This speaks to the godliness that has to do with woman. If one were to reject God, he will spend eternity in damnation. However, all who accept God as the one and only will live in everlasting comfort with [Her] in heaven.
This is hinted upon again in chapter 17. We find out that Nwoye has become very interested in the new religion from the very first time he has heard of it. However, because of his overwhelming fear of his father, he does not go beyond watching them closely. To Okonkwo, Christianity is very feminine, and once he found out that Nwoye has been near the Christians, he confronts him and beats him because of it. He laments to himself about it later, saying “to abandon the god’s of one’s father and go about with a lot of effeminate men clucking like old hems was the very depth of abomination…How could he have a begotten woman for a son?”, (Achebe 88-89). This again shows Okonkwo rejecting the femininity that is associated with the religion, not understanding that it is something that brings his own son comfort. Nwoye uses this opportunity to finally leave his father and vows to never return except to convert his mother and siblings. The fact that he Nwoye easily accepted the idea of leaving his father for the “comfort of his ‘mother’ [God], shows that Nwoye has indeed been saved in a sense, and gets to live. For Okonkwo, however, his rejection has cost him his life.
Achebe,Chinua. “Things Fall Apart.” Things Fall Apart: A Norton Critical Edition, edited by Francis Abiole Irele, W.W. Norton & Co., 2009. pg 3-117.
Iyasere, Soloman O. “Narrative Techniques in Things Fall Apart.” Achebe, Chinua. Things Fall Apart. Ed. Francis Abiola Irele. New York City: W. W. Norton & Company Inc, 2009. 370-385.