Chapter I

An endless train, I wondered if we were ever going to reach our destination, Black Hawk Nevada.  I felt so alone.  Mama and Papa were already so scared about our journey.  A new unknown place, with new people, a new language.  Mama and Papa couldn’t speak any English, and the only thing that I knew in English was our destination, our new home, Black Haw Nebraska.  I looked outside the window and took in the scenery.  There was an endless amount of land around me.  The fluffy white clouds rode in the pale blue sky, being slowly driven by gentle breezes towards the southwest. They reminded me of piles of pillows. I began to imagine faces and shapes within them. The blue of the sky, where it could be seen between the clouds was paler near the horizon and slightly darker higher up.  The soft green grass, which sloped gently to the left had been mown a few days before and new blades of it were thrusting skywards, each blade trying to outdo it’s neighbor and get the greatest share of the sunlight. I wanted to remove my worn and unpolished shoes and my brightly striped socks with a hole in one toe and run across the soft grass. The feeling of it under my bare and tender feet would be like running on a rich luxurious carpet.  I was ready, ready to start my new life.

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4 Responses to Chapter I

  1. morrisi says:

    I really enjoyed reading this post! It really feels as if you were taking on Antonia’s perspective when you were reading this scene. Also your concluding sentence is great because you really believe that this character is excited to begin their new life. Overall great post!

  2. Emily says:

    I really enjoyed reading this piece! I think your descriptions of the landscape are really spot on and I could picture the scenery really well in my mind. Your rendition of Antonia’s perspective on moving to Nebraska makes me realize how little of Antonia’s innermost feelings we get to see as readers of Jim’s version of her. Her own introspection and sense of the world is lost within a man’s story – kind of telling about society in general.

  3. ilantrencher says:

    A post that seems to have its own story woven into just 1 paragraph. Beginning with a somewhat bleak outlook on the situation, it slowly moves towards a more optimistic view once the imagery has softened the transition. Especially the sensory imagery at the very end.

  4. Professor Seiler says:

    Sachi, I agree with your peers’ comments about the strength of your focalization of landscape description through Antonia, rather than Jim. This choice is especially striking, given that Jim is so prone, as a narrator, to extended–and often romanticized–scenic views of the Nebraska territory. Here, Antonia can see that grandeur, too, and see it *differently* from how Jim does. Nice job!

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