“How I hate this desolate month!” my lady said, as she walked about the garden, shivering beneath her sable mantle. “Everything dropping to ruin and decay, and the cold flicker of the sun lighting up the ugliness of the earth, as the glare of gas-lamps lights the wrinkles of an old woman. Shall I ever grow old, Phoebe? Will my hair ever drop off as the leaves are falling from those trees, and leave me wan and bare like them? What is to become of me when I grow old?”
She shivered at the thought of this more than she had done at the wintry breeze, and muffling herself closely in her fur, walked so fast, that her maid had some difficulty in keeping up with her. (108,109)
After closely looking at this passage, it was evident to me that although Lady Audley is referring to the literal, ‘ugliness of the earth’ and to what will happen to her when she grows old, the passage reveals Lady Audley’s guilt towards her actions thus far. When she describes, ‘everything dropping to ruin and decay, and the cold flicker of the sun lighting up the ugliness of the earth,’, she could be alluding to the complicated situation she is now in due to George Talboys’ return to England and the unlikely chance that he ends up residing in Audley and how George or someone else could piece the story together if they find out about her past which relates to when Lady Audley says, ‘the cold flicker of the sun lighting up the ugliness of the earth.’, which almost sounds like, ‘the harsh reality lighting up the truth of the situation’.
Lady Audley also make herself seem much older than she actually is from this passage, she repeats the word, ‘old’, three times in relation to herself, which is odd considering how short the passage is as well as how young she is. This hints at her past because she sounds as if she is already tired and ready to give up and the life that Phoebe thinks Lady Audley lived, gives no reason for her to sound so disheartened. However, because Phoebe found the baby slipper and lock of hair, she might begin to piece things together. Also, as readers we know about more about Lady Audley’s past so this passage perfectly describes someone much older than their years, already defeated.
Braddon even adds, ‘she shivered at the thought of this more than she had done at the wintry breeze,’, confirming my thoughts about her guilt and panic towards her secret.
I think the close reading on “the cold flicker…” and this writer’s interpretation of “the harsh reality lighting up the truth of the situation” is excellent! It brought me to another idea. Could she also be chilled by the thought that when her much older husband dies, she will have no claim on the estate because it will probably go to Robert, the only male heir. Lady Audley would no longer possess that which attracts men to her now. Her youthful, childlike charm would be made grotesque by age, and possible poverty, making the chance of finding another rich man to adore and spoil her very unlikely. She would be left with the cold, decaying and ugly truths of her monstrous deeds, that are perhaps buried in two graves.
It is also important to note Lady Audley’s reference to the French novel that follows the quotes above. Lady Audley talks about the French story the two of them had read, “the story of a beautiful woman who committed some crime—I forget what—in the zenith of her power and loveliness” (109). This question posed to Phoebe almost seems to outline the presumed plot line of Braddon’s Lady Audley’s Secret within the book itself. It appears that the foreshadowing of Lady Audley’s life—both past and present—is strong in these passages.
Lady Audley has been constantly associated with the color yellow as well. From her hair and dress (pg. 60) to the novels she reads (pg. 108), yellow has followed her around. Just like the outright mention of ruin and decay that A points to, yellow is symbolically associated with death and decay. As we have discussed in class, there is very little subtlety in this novel. With such overt references to decay in the description of Lady Audley, she might as well be a personification of death itself. It makes sense too since she would thus be what she seems to fear the most.