“One of Your Girls” by Troye Sivan is a song about how a gay man (Troye Sivan) makes himself likeable to men who he’s attracted to. The line “Give me a call if you ever get lonely, I’ll be like one of your girls or your homies” enforces heterosexism and highlights the expectation of men (especially gay men) to fit a particular mold of either hyper feminine or hypermasculine. In the case of this song, Troye Sivan has chosen to feminize himself in order to gain favor of his suitor. These limitations, however, serve as an excuse for society to behave aggressively and controllingly towards marginalized people. This theme of society not accepting gay men for their sexual identity and/or how they present themselves (as well as anyone who deviates from the determined “normal”) is common in the literature analyzed in this class such as “Boy in a Whalebone Corset” by Saeed Jones in his collection Prelude to Bruise. In this selection, the speaker’s father beats him and burns the clothes which he deems “sissy clothes.” The speaker’s method of self-expression in this poem is his feminine clothing, and his father shows his disapproval for his son’s representation of himself by destroying them as soon as he finds them. This passage reflects society’s desire to control individuals who are different and not accept queer people for who they are and how they chose to present themselves.
In the music video for this song, Troye Sivan is seen in drag dancing on a vision of masculinity (Ross Lynch) who is muscular, blonde, dressed in a wife-beater tank top, and sat manspreading in a chair in an empty, white room. This connects to the story in “Growing Up Gay, Growing Up Lesbian” wherein gay men in Little Havana, Florida felt more comfortable transitioning or presenting more feminine regardless of their authentic feelings surrounding their own gender. Because of the pressure from a heterosexist American society, people would prefer to have an inauthentic lifestyle if that meant feeling relatively safe or comfortable to love who they love. In the music video, Troye Sivan is just in drag, but it reminded me of the men who Jesse G. Monteagudo described as “unhappy and confused” who felt forced to live inauthentically in order to survive at all.
Using the notion of society placing individuals into a confined space, the same could be applied to the woman in “The Legend of Auntie Po” since Bee’s character showcases the system of placing people into a space that the US enforces, essentially having control over the expectations of a women’s role. However, Mei comes from a cultural background; the system enforces itself to Mei as the conversation of a woman’s role is brought on Bee as she talks about her goals in life. It helps that Mei has more cultural upbringing or struggles since that piles up to what can lead to a challenge against the repressive mindset.
I love the song “One of Your Girls” and I am personally a fan of Troye Sivans music! I think this song speaks to a larger issue at hand that queer people need to live up to the same expectations and gender roles at straight people in order to be deemed as “worthy” or “valuable”. I think a majority of queer people have felt this pressure in their life whether they are asked “who is the man/woman in the relationship?” or whether they will have kids and be married (nuclear family esc). The pressure to conform to societal norms can often get into queer people’s head and for some it ultimately discourages them to come out. For people like Joe, from “Angels In America”, there is added pressure to perform masculinity as well as uphold his religious beliefs by being married to a woman. As that ultimately is broken down as he falls in love with Louis, we see a softer, caring, and genuine side from Joe as he lives his life my authentically. I think Troyes music sends a message to the world that queer people deserve to live their lives wither they conform to what is expected of them or not. A true icon. :>
I LOVE this song and you really have just shed a new light to it for me. Troy changing himself to be “like one of your girls or your homies” I heard it in that way but it’s so true and makes alot of sense connecting to our class. He shouldn’t have to choose between two drastic sides to be validated or accepted neither his manliness, femininity, or queerness need to be debated. Troy shouldn’t have to be like a girl or a homie it’s the choice of being his authentic self that should be accepted and expected. Instead we expect this talented twink to choose a side of how to present himself in his queerness but with fame and spotlight really we should have no expectations for what his presentation should be. I think about this and jojo siwa’s drama with constant hypothesis from fans. Maybe pressure from fans and the. Ridicule from people around her while maybe she just isn’t sure what she wants to be while she’s pushed to choose a very girly girl cutie presentation or a butch rockstar lesbian. The expectations of society to choose an extreme can be viewed through celebrity’s trying to please the crowd. Just a hypothesis.
I loved your analysis of the song and how you connected it to Saeed Jones and Jesse Monteagudo. Your analysis reminds me of scene 1, act 7 in Angels in America when during his dream, Prior wears drag makeup to cheer himself up, reminiscing about his time as a drag queen and how makeup makes him happy. However, he eventually takes his makeup off in frustration and despair because his situation prevents him from experiencing those simple joys, hobbies, and coping mechanisms that make him who he is. As Prior says, “you know you’ve hit rock-bottom when even drag is a drag” (Kusher). In relation to your analysis, Prior attempts to live inauthentically as that is what he believes he needs to do, when in reality, he survives by accepting his suffering and embracing his authentic life, including every little part of him that makes him who he is.
I really like how you connect “One of Your Girls” to the pressure queer men face to fit into narrow gender expectations. The line about being “one of your girls or your homies” really does show how people get pushed into either being overly feminine or overly masculine just to be accepted. Your connection to Prelude to Bruise really drives the point home, especially the moment where the father burns the “sissy clothes.” It shows how society punishes anyone who expresses gender in a way that doesn’t fit the norm.