Evolving Undercurrents in The Blue Dress

“is only the moon sees me floating through the streets, is me in a / blue dress / out to sea, is my mother is a moon out to sea.” (3)

As I gave The Blue Dress more and more time during our in-class freewrite, I was surprised by the layers beneath the surface, and the fact that each one changed my fundamental emotional response to the characters mother. These lines represent my initial reading, but in order to complete that picture, I also have to pull from an earlier set of lines: “is a good-bye in a flooded, antique room, is good-bye in a room of / crystal bowls…” – At first I fixated on the flooded, antique room as a dissolution of family-tied (assumed heteronormative) tradition(s), a metaphor that accompanied the dress. Then, in the final lines “is only the moon… is my mother is a moon” I connected the mother to the light of the moon, and gave primarily positive connotations to this mother daughter relationship. This createed the picture of a mother standing beside her daughter, who is wearing this new dress, and stepping out to sea as part of a new generation, a new identity. (lesbian/queer.)

I wrote in my free-write that this “does not give the impression of judgement.” But I also admitted that something wasn’t quite right, and the language surrounding her mother didn’t quite give the impression of complete acceptance, either. As I sat with the poem longer, I was drawn to the repeated sentiments such as “out to sea” “floating through the streets” and “crystal bowls.” I would really appreciate someone’s take on the repition of crystal bowls, but for me, the other two sentiments were enough to change my perspective on the poem. Being “out to sea” can go either way in terms of positive or negative connotations, but I think for most people it’s closely related to being “lost at sea,” and the poem has such a dreamlike quality that to me is also a red flag – you don’t want to be falling asleep at the wheel of a boat. You also get the dreamlike quality from “bed” in line 13. “Floating through the streets” is very important, especially when compared with one of the primary drivers of the poem: being watched. I’m not sure if all my build up was necessary or if it was just confusing, but it’s important to note that the main character, while aware that they are floating through the streets, is only seen by the mother. What’s more, the mother sees past the dress, sees the corporeal form of “me”, and the word “floating” is attributed to the way the mother sees.

The more I think about this poem, the more jumbled my thoughts get, honestly, there’s just so much going on and so many potential connections. There’s so many words that stand out as well, like how the dress the character wears belongs (or belonged) to her mother. – Does her mother being in the moon mean that she has passed? There’s so many things to point to this, the good-byes, the tears, the leaks. And now I’m moving even beyond the train of thought that asks “was the mother supportive.” Now I’m back with the hurricane (that drowned house – line 11) with the death of a mother and the items the main character kept (are the crystal cups and bowls heirlooms she’s leaving behind?) And what about the one very specific place mentioned, the Mississippi river? There’s just so much more to this poem than I initially gave it credit for, and I liked it on the first read.