“This is the moment when I’m supposed to be self-righteous and angry.” (18)
The narrator is resistant to being cast into the role of the tragic hero. They are as tangled in, and conflicted with, this script as they are in their affairs. The use of “supposed” suggest that the narrator is expected to act in a specific way. The self-righteous response that is suggested can be good and virtuous. However self-righteous could also hint at arrogance. This may be the reason that the narrator sounds resistant to this action. We also have to consider that this happens in a moment. That is, the narrator claims to be acting instinctively. In this context, the narrator’s lack of action suggests an indifference or even hostility to the force that expects them to react further hinting at an act of resistance.
The narrator does not follow the script. The narrator does not let another affair end. This could be them trying to reach an idealized love that they claim to have forgotten. But this search for an ideal is itself rather tragic. As they attempt to make their relationships work out the narrator also draws closer to the realization that, perhaps, the ideal really doesn’t exist. That realization, that the narrator could be driving themselves to ruin in an attempt to avoid imperfection, is the sort of ironic fate that only the most tragic of characters deserves. And even more tragic is the narrator’s own suggestion, in the following paragraph; that they might be aware of the ironic end they are rushing towards.